Oops, I Think I Just GRADUATED! :’)

It feels odd, and fuzzy. The formal printed certificate finally made the realization tangible enough to hit home and I thought 'hey, when did I grow up?' I can't believe I'll never have to go to school again, see any of these people again or that I'll give up on a huge part of my daily life ever since I knew how to call life for what it is, you know? This tiny virtual life where people aren't that mean and life isn't that hard, and news is nothing more but how the pizza's not stale today because they've just unloaded a fresh batch, getting at its possible worst hearing that the head nun passed away and discussing how she's been a living heritage of this school from its first baby steps well into its golden 5th decade. Looking back on all the years I spent at school, it wasn't nearly as bad as when I decided to hit life's playground. Look at me, I'm actually being nostalgic about an inept closed community. Who would've thought man. Me and feelings, oh well.

Haha, it's almost like these tribal missions of woes and hallows they used to send savages out on to assert their manhood and win the chief's daughter's hand in marriage, and somehow I managed to come back with the severed head of a wild boar. It certainly doesn't feel like it, it feels like I'm a big fish in a little pond who was prematurely released in the ocean. These people are sending me out to real life under the impression that I should know how to go with it by now. I just hope they don't ask for their money back when they realized that I'm not nearly what they bargained for. It's one of these few moments you appreciate that the government couldn't give less of a fuck about you. If it did, I'd definitely be in trouble.

I was talking to my grown-up friend then; that's what I call him because the first day I met him he'd just come back from a presentation and was fresh in a suit with a briefcase in hand, looking like the textbook definition of the financial advisor he is. A man in his late twenties, with wit so sharp that it's almost cruel seeing it confined in a blue collar. We have this joke going on, where he leads me into the dark corridors of life and I call him an old man. He was saying how from here on in,  everything is like high school, except there's more money and sex and people are constantly getting older. I was confused because from where I'm standing, that doesn't sound much different, except that it's actually easier to come by, statistically speaking. That's when he started whining about growing up in the 90's. There was really no reason to this story other than the fact that that's probably how I'll remember today, it'll be the day I advised a tax advisor about life and confused him with the numbers.